27/06/2017 by Kevin Campbell 0 Comments
The Path of the Mature Masculine
To walk the path of the Mature Masculine takes most of all responsibility, or the ability to respond. From the previous blog you can see that the influences of our lives can create our sense of identity, they can also create go to behaviours that if left unexamined can create unwanted and unhealthy situations.
What I am talking about here are triggers. Triggers are people, places and things, that cause us to react emotionally and behaviourally. They tend to originate in our past and are generally connected to a difficult or traumatic event in childhood. Because children are vulnerable and lack experience, when they are exposed to trauma or a difficult situation they react from a survival instinct. When you are triggered as an adult you are acting out of that same survival instinct that was designed to keep you safe. You are coming from the same place as that boy, feeling the same emotions, and reacting in the same way. This had worked for you, it had kept you relatively safe, but now as an adult it is restricting you, forcing you into a corner and throwing you into emotions that take away your power.
As we get older, the trigger might get easier to deal with as we learn to work with it better, but if it is not faced head on the charge remains, the emotion takes control and you are put back to that time when you were a boy. Being in the Mature Masculine is about stopping this process. It is about facing the trigger, feeling the emotion that is connected with it head on, and not running from it. Its about creating a responsible action to the trigger that better serves you, allowing you to take back your power and have choice.
Facing the fears, shame, guilt and anger from our triggers allows us to become more familiar with them, reduces their charge, and frees us of their control over us. Being in the Mature Masculine allows us to take back our power, creating choice and responsibility for our behaviour and gives us our right to express our emotions in a healthy way. It gives us the ability to respond on our terms as healthy responsible men.
Next week we will look at emotions and the relationship to them. Until then please comment and subscribe. Thank you.